Cant be bothered with..

Hey girls. 

Today I thought I'd share with you the things that i just never seem to have time for when it comes to beauty.

I'm constantly running out of time when I'm getting ready in the morning and there are somethings that i just cant be bothered to do. These aren't not things that i don't want to do, just things i can live without doing for a while.

Painting my Nails

  Don't get me wrong i love painting my nails but i just never seem to have the time or patients to do it. As soon as I've painted them i forget about them and end up smudging them all over my hands. Or i have little finger prints in them. It always just seems like a faff to have to wait for them to dry and i cant wear it to work so i have to take it off anyway.

Face masks/Scrubs

To be honest I'm really not that bothered about exfoliating my face or anything. My skin is pretty good and i don't get many spots so i don't really see the point. I will do it occasionally if I'm having a relaxing bath or something but the rest of the time I'm just not that bothered about it.

I did buy a face scrub not that long ago, in the hope that it would encourage me to use it... but no. I'm just too lazy to i guess.

Re-touching lipstick

I guess i said that this was a post on things i didn't do because i couldn't be bothered.. well i guess this is the exception. I do re-touch my lipstick regularly and I'm always conscious of it having worn off.. but i wish that i didn't have to worry. I know you get some lipsticks that stay on for ever or come with a balm that makes it impossible to come off.. but i find that they just really dry out my lips and make them feel really funny. 

I suppose touch ups are something that anyone who wears lipstick has to endure.. 

Self Tanning

I am terrible when it comes to tan.

I don't mind being pale, and I'm just too scared of streaks to do it myself. Maybe i just haven't found the right one yet.. but i always seem to look yellow when ever i try it. Also, and this cant just be me, I HATE the smell. I don't particularly enjoy waking up in the morning to my room smelling of baby sick..  and it makes ALL your clothes smell of it too. I would try get a real tan but my skin takes an awful long time to turn brown. I guess I'll just have to be pale forever more.

So those are some of the things i just never have the time for. Please let me know any of the things you cant be bothered to do in the comments. 

Thanks for reading

Cat

We be BBQ

You know summer is here when you have your first BBQ of the year! And for me, that day was today. After work I had a spur of the moment decision to have some friends rounds and fire up the barbee.. Of corse that meant that the sun then F'ed off for the rest of the day, but that's just luck I guess.. So without further a do, here are some of my favourite pictures of the event! 

Cooking up some sausages like a pro! 

Doing some moves while the sun was stilly around! Bit of a finger over the lenses but we will ignore that! 

Being a waiter to all my older friends who can drink legally! H8 being the youngest! :( 

Time for a selfie. 

Not quite sure how much of this pose is a piss take..? 

Awww fwends

Work it Aaron!

All alone at the grill all out of the action. 

 

After it got cold we headed inside for a game of 'heads up' which is an app I just got on my iPod. It's really fun to play and is such a good group game! I'd check it out if you already haven't! Lost my voice from shouting out so much.

That's bout all I'll put in. Don't want to bore you all to much! 

Incase any of you are wondering on my lips I have on M.A.C 'so chaud' and my sun glasses are from urban outfitters! 

Let me know what you think of this kind of day too day life post.. I am going to Edinburgh soon and have plans for a Edinburgh blog post. Will be taking my camera with me though so hopefully the pictures will be a little more tasteful!  Also trying our the blogger app for the first time on my iPod which is why this post may be a little lacking. 

Anyways thanks for reading and speak to you soon! 

Cat x

Those 5 things we shouldnt have done..

Hey Girls,

Do you ever find your self cringing at your life. I know i do! Sometimes a memory will just pop into my head and WON'T LEAVE. We all have things we regret doing, and I'm not talking about big things in life, no I'm talking about those little things that still really get to us. Whether it was kissing that guy who turned out to be a bit of a stalker.. or saying something that make things super awkward with someone. Well I'm fed up of thinking about them. So I'm saying good bye to all those cringy moments and mistakes and moving on. 

 

So here i give to you those 5 things I'm sure we can all relate to in some way.. those 5 things that we really shouldn't have done.

1. Let them get to me- I think we can all confirm that at some point in our lives we have let somebody get into our heads and make us feel a little bit shit. Whether you get the piss taken out of you for making a blog (anyone else get this when your friends found it?)

Or you get a bit paranoid about your ex and another girl..?

We have all been there is some way or another, but we shouldn't have to feel crappy.We just have to tell ourselves that we are in fact the bigger person and just ignore who or what ever it is.

2.Waisted the days in bed- Now i have to say I'm very guilty of doing this. I'll spend all night on the Internet watching YouTube or looking at new blog posts, then wake up late the next morning and just keep repeating the process until i have to go to work or something. Sometimes i just forget to live. Which is one of the reasons i first made this blog (a little project to get me doing something other than sitting in bed). Its quite alright to have a lazy day once in a while. I know we can all feel down some days. But i like to remind myself not to take life for granted all the time. Life is so special and i just sit on my ass all day.

3.Didn't say YES- We all have those things that we just WISH we had said "Hell Yes" too. There are so many things i wish i had done last year and i feel like i missed out on so much! Whether you miss out on something hilarious that your friends continue to go on about for the rest of the month, or you missed meeting that super hot guy you had been facebook stalking.. We all wish we had been there instead of at home or at that 'family dinner'. 

 4.Shouldn't have said that!- Ever get a bit excited and blurt something out? I've done it a few times (OK maybe a few hundred), its the worst when i meet new people. I get too excited and either act like a complete weirdo or i will just speak super loud so that everyone within 10 miles can hear me. My mum is constantly telling me that she can only hear my voice if i with a group of friends. I have a really bad habit of speaking to quickly as well. I will get excited and just ramble something out super quick, this always ends up in me not saying something correctly or getting myself all confused. But i think its worse when you say something that someone is NOT meant to ever know. If you have been told a secret and it accidentally slips out in conversation. That's when you feel like one guilty mofo.

5. Gotten so attached- Now some of you may have been lucky enough to avoid this final situation. Getting too attached to someone (boy or girl) is the worst if they don't feel the same way. But you convince yourself that they like you back just the same and that constantly trying to speak to them wont annoy them at all. Its only after they start to get agitated that you finally realise. But by then its too late to save it. I guess sometimes you have to just leave them be and wait for them to realise how important you are to them.

I really hope that some of you can relate to this. 

Thanks for reading

 Cat x

Whats in my Make-up Bag?

Hey Girls!

Often i find my friends asking what kind of make-up i use on a daily basis.

So i thought some of yoou might be interested too! :D These are the things i just cant feel complete without.

My M.A.C Prep+Prime

My Foundation- Combination of Maybeline Fit me in 115 and M.A.C Studio Sculpt in NW15 is a must have for me! I dont feel comfortable without at least some foundation on. And if im not wearing make-up then im having a lazy day where im not going out.

Something else i use daily is powder. After seeing such a hype on Rimmels Stay Matte i thought id give it a go. I do think its good but i dont feel like it stays on AMAZINGLY. But just a bit over the nose and forehead seems to do the trick for a good couple hours. I do love the way a powder sets the face though! Another must have on, for me.

Eyebrows are something i cant not do now. I never use to bother but now im a little obsessed. If im in a rush i will just shove a bit of brown pencil over them, but when i have time i use my Browyings by Benefit (in Dark) i love how its a combination of gel and powder rather than just two different shades of powder like so many other brow kits are. I will be repurchasing!

You will always find a mascara in my make up bag, this is something that i honestly dont know what i'd do with out. I guess i dont really think about it that much, but i really do love the person who invented it!

On the right there is my fave lip salve. It smells sooooo amazing and makes my lips super soft. I always put this on before my lipstick..

   which brings me onto my last must have! My lipstick collection is ever growing and this photo is just to represent them all. I wear lipstick every day, no matter the occasion. This one above is 'Perfect Day' by Soap and Glory which is a formulation im really loving at the moment. I have three lipsticks from them (Pom Pom and Man Trap along with this one) and im really loving them at the moment. So super pigmented and moisturising

And lastly a lil cute mirror and  pack of tissues to finish off.

So thats everything in my make-up bag that i use daily.
To be honest i do use alot more on my face, but not every day!

Hope you have enjoyed this little insight into my life. Please feel free to comment with any questions or anything!

Thanks for reading and i'll speak to you all super soon!

Cat x

A list for a bucket

After having a pretty crappy 2012 and finally coming out the other side of my anxiety and panic attacks, i really wanted to make 2013 a good year!

So far its been pretty swell, but there are a couple of things i really want to do before this year is up. So ive written myself a bucket list. Now from my understanding ( correct me if im wrong) 'bucket list' comes from the expression "kick the bucket" so is a list of things to do before you die..? Correct?

Ok so ignoring the fact that this is only the things i want to achieve this year and not before i die, lets get going

1. Learn to drive (I got lessons for my birthday which was in November... i will start them soon, promise)
2. Go to College (I have applied, so half way there)
3. Save up (Not doing too well so far)
4. Buy a Macbook air (hence the wanting to save up)
5. Start a YouTube Channel (I'll get back to you on that one..)
6. Visit Aliya at UNI (look at past post 'will always love and cherish' if your a bit confused)
7. Go on a ROAD TRIP!! (come on who doesn't want to do that!)
8. Say YESS to more. (This is something i hardly did when i had my anxiety attacks.)
9. Keep on Blogging  (no matter what happens)

So that's my 'Bucket' list. 

These are all things i should be able to do this year. And i hope to be able to complete all of these before the end of the year.

There was one more on my list though and that was;

10. Turn 18 and hit the town (This isn't really an ambition its more of a fact that WILL happen)

Thanks for reading 

Fash-i-on #5

Man, i'm soo pale

This picture has no real reason for being in here. I just really love my facial expression..

Shirt-Urban Outfitters

Skirt-Urban Outfitters

So here we are. We have finally made it to the final post of my Fash-i-on posts. I have no clue why they are called 'Fash-i-on', seemed a good idea at the time i guess.

This is my favourite outfit out of all the past 5 posts. I love the two prints together! Urrrghh. I just love them! To be honest ive not got much to say about this outfit..i guess you can just have a look and decide for yourself.

I hope to be posting some more 'life' posts soon as i really enjoy writing them. It feels good to be able to get things off my chest.

Anyways thanks for reading and i will see ya'll again soon. (Ohh gone a bit American there..)

Anxiety ruined me

Hey Chums.

This a re-type of a post ive already done (but now deleted as i thought it was to rushed and confusing) so i have decided to re-write. 

WARNING: this will be the longest post ever!!!!!!!!

So im just going to start off and be blunt. Last year fricking sucked for me!

And it was 100% my fault.

During February of 2012 i was having some stomach isues, nothing serious, but i was starting to get worried about it. Then one day when i was in town with my friends i suddenly started to feel very nervous and anxious about my stomach. Thinking i was going to start feeling ill, i got myself all worked up and stressed out. After, when everything was fine, i forgot all about the ordeal.

But then it happened again.

And again.

And again.

Etc.

After about a month of it happening, i just avoided going into town altogether. It seemed to help.

I wouldnt really think about it until someone asked me to go shopping, when i would have to make up a lame excuse and shrug off the feeling of terror i was feeling.

By two months i was really starting to limit where i would go, and my friends and family were starting to notice.

I dont remember the conversation i had with my parents, and i cant remember when i came to the realisation, but from then i knew...

I was living with anxiety.

Telling my friends that i was having panic attacks regularly was one of the hardest things to do. Obviously they didnt understand as it had all happened so quickly and they couldnt quite grasp the fact that i just found everywhere very uncomfortable and scary. I didnt know how to tell them without wanting to break down and cry.

This also put alot of pressure on my relationship with my boyfriend, as i didnt want to go out anywhere with him. (spoiler alert) We broke up later on in the year. But i am still so grateful of how much he respected me even thought i was suffering really badly.

During exam leave was when things started to get really crappy. I was so stressed with revising for school and i was terrified i was going to be ill in my exams, all i could think about was anxiety and how much i hated it. I cried almost every night trying desperately to convince myself that i would wake up with everything back to normal. It never happened.

Even when i thought back to old memories of myself out in town, at the beach or park, i would panic.

My exams were some of the most horrible experiences for me. Trapped in a room for hours, with 100 other people, complete silence and nothing to distract me.

 It was truly awful.

Thankfully i did well in my exams, but the experience of them put me off for life.

By the summer holidays i was in a deep depression. I was no longer with my boyfriend, i was already finding 5th impossible and i was stuck in my house all day, every day.

It felt like i was in prison. Every day was just as dark and miserable as the day before.

The only times i was happy was when my friends would come and visit me. We would have a water fight in the garden of have a BBQ. I dont think i ever really thanked them for doing all that for me, but i wish in some way i could repay them for the time and effort they spent on me.

They really tried so hard to get me out the house and were so patient.

By the time school was back on, i was at my worst. After being in a 6 week depression i was really hating life. (Not in a, im going to self-harm, way.)

 I was just fed up.

I had put so much pressure on my parents and had really upset them.

Witnessing your parents crying uncontrollably over something you have caused is something id wish on no one. 

But the guilt didnt help, it just made me feel even more depressed. 

Then i stopped wanting to go to school. At first my parents tried to get me to go. I would cry like a little girl, just because i was so terrified of the walk alone to school. I would physically shake so much that i would feel sick. After a couple weeks, i just refused to get up. I would go to sleep shaking, wake up shaking and only be able to relax when i knew that i didnt have to go into school that day.

I visited a psychologist twice but even found it to hard to go to his sessions without a full blown stressful panic.

Eventually, much to my joy, and my parents disappointment, i left school.

For about two months i got to sit on my ass all day and do nothing, i would make no effort to eat properly or live any sort of life. I was a hermit.

Eventually, my mum had enough and made me look for a job. At first i was still too terrified to walk anywhere that was further than the top of my street so the reality of my getting a job was slim. Fortunately there is a small hotel at the top of my road, i managed to hand a CV in there.

Would you believe it they gave me a job!!

Just after i turned 17 i started work there.

Slowly i got my confidence back, and made new friends. I started to regain control after having lost it for so long. Soon after i started i was able to see a huge improvement in my life. I was no longer depressed, and crying all the time. My parents were happier, and so was i. 

After a couple months i was able to go into town and do things like i had before.

I had my life back. 

Even thought anxiety had really weakened a lot of my relationships with people i still felt so happy and refreshed.  

Now.

Now i am back. Happy, comfortable and in control. Anxiety and panic are all in the past for me and i dont ever want it coming back. I had to make some huge sacrifices (like leaving school) to get over it, but im so glad i made those choices, other wise i dont know where that dark path would have taken me. 

Im SO sorry this is such a long post, but if you have taken the time to read it then thank you, it means alot.

I know other people out there will be suffering with anxiety and IF any of you ever feel this way then just have faith. It might take some time, you might have to make some sort of changes to your life, but i promise that it WILL get better.

 I may not be an expert on the topic, but i am a survivor.

Thank you for reading!!

Fash-i-on #4

 

 

 Jacket- Topshop sale (£25)

Top- River Island

 Disco Pants- Topshop

Chelsea boots- Office

Hey chums.

Fashion is back after that short break of me relaying my feelings ( if you dont know what im on about look at my last post).

Again another quite casual look you for today. 

Here ive got on a jacket that i found in the Topshop sale recently. You may have seen it in Topshop (they also do it in green) and when i saw it was in the sale (£25) i just couldnt resist. Id been looking for a light weight jacket for agess so this was just perfect. I got it in a size 12 which is a little big, but i like my jackets to be silghly over sized. 

Only one more outfit left!

Thanks for reading.

Will always love and cherish

Hey chums.

Thought id take a little break from the fashion hauls i've been uploading to write up something a little different. 

I remember when i was a little kid, playing in the garden with my friends. 

Trying to build an igloo in winter. 

Climbing up onto my best friend Anna's garage and jumping off the roof. Playing with dolls and cycling up and down my back lane. I remember when Anna first introduced me to Aliya, who had just moved back from America to the house next door. 

That's when it all really started.

 

These two have been my best friends since i can remember and they are still the people who i will always love and cherish. But things are changing now.

So its the end of the school year and very soon it will be the summer holidays. Now normally i would be super happy about this time of year but this year im not so excited.

After the holidays my best friend Aliya will be moving to Uni. 

Even thought im so pleased for her that she is going to a really good University, i hate the fact that she is moving away. In September she will move to Edinburgh and our relationship will change forever.

 At the moment i can go round and see her whenever she is free, i can call her up and see her within 5 minuets. Even if its only for an hour or so it doesn't matter because we live so close it takes no effort at all. 

When she moves though that cant happen anymore. I cant just pop over for a chat. Or call her up when i need to go to Asda but dont want to walk by myself.

 After September, going to see her is going to take weeks of planning, time off work, and money for the train. She is going to meet new people and have new friends. I wont be able to just call her up because she will be in lectures or busy with studying. Im really going to miss her and i dont feel like its hit me yet.

Of corse i will be able to go visit her and meet all her new friends and maybe one day i'll even move to Edinburgh too (its in the life plan). I am really looking forward to all the amazing memories to come.

All the times we will remember forever.. and all the ones we will be to drunk to remember at all. 

She will be back at weekends to visit the family and i will get to see her then.

I guess im just scared that things will really change before im ready for them too.

Im going to cry like a baby when she leaves.

 

Thanks for reading.

x

Fash-i-on #3

Acid wash Jeans- TopShop

Top- Topshop

Chelsea boots- Office

Beanie- Urban Outfitters

This time ive gone for a little more casual with my outfits. This is the type of thing i wear on a day to day basis. I love these Acid wash jeans from Topshop as they are so comfortable and they go with so much!

Really loving my Chelsea boots too. Black seems to be the colour that most of my shoes are at the moment, which is great coz black goes with so much too. 

Sorry these pictures are a little strange, i feel really weird posing for photos, but it was the best way to get the pictures of the clothes.

Thanks for reading.